Ok, so this is a very cheezy song, with a pretty annoying tune...but for some reason l overlooked that and listened to the lyrics as l drove home from work today...or rather to pick up Seth. I was thinking "Man, l have to go in after working all day...and make dinner...and do the laundry...and wash the dishes and make our lunches...and thats not fun" (but hey...here l am 7pm, dinner done, laundry done, dishes done and nothing to do but sit in front of my husband, while he watches Fringe, for my massage!!)

So here are the lyrics

Listen as your day unfolds
Challenge what the future holds
Try to keep your head up to the sky
Lovers they may cause you tears
Go ahead release your fears
Stand up and be counted
Don't be shamed to cry

You gotta be bad
You gotta be bold
You gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard
You gotta be tough
You gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool
You gotta be calm
You gotta stay together
All i know all i know is love will save the day

Herld what your mother said
Read the books your father read
Try to solve the puzzles in your own sweet time
Some may have more cash than you
Others take a different view
My oh my, eh eh eh

You gotta be bad
You gotta be bold
You gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard
You gotta be tough
You gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool
You gotta be calm
You gotta stay together
All i know all i know is love will save the day

Time asks no questions
It goes on without you
Leaving you behind if you can't stand the pace
The world keeps on spinning
Can't stop it if you try to
The best part is danger staring you in the face
Oh..remember..

Listen as your day unfolds
Challenge what the future holds
Try to keep your head up to the sky
Lovers they may cause you tears
Go ahead release your fears
My oh my eh eh eh

So l listened...without turning it off and thought, hey this is so true. Sometimes l feel like a complete schmuck at work and l thought heck yeah, sometimes you just have to be tougher or calmer. Sometimes l am so tired and irritable with my huband and l ought to be wiser and cooler! And l thought yeah, l ought to listen to what my Mum says sometimes, and my Dad has always read good books...l should read more of what he's read.

And I like how it says the world keeps on moving and you can't stop it if you try! You just have to keep on moving with it and l love that, 'cause l love to keep up with it! (Seriously, they're almost on their way to making real transformers now! How advanced is that!)

The only bit l don't really get is where it say's Love will save the day. Love's awesome and all, but l don't see how it could be that life saving...perhaps l'm wrong. lt just seems to me this song is all about having a positive attitude and talking yourself up to things rather than being loved enough to be positive...hmm...

Anyway, makes me wonder if l'll start listening to Pop more and looking for meaning in it....uh, actually probably not...

l slept a lot this morning...l think l could champion naptime!

Anyway, l finally headed out to the grocery store at 12 and came to a stop at one of the busier intersections in Maple Grove. l was the first car at the light. There in front of me in the middle of the intersection is some sort of book with the wind leafing through its pages.

l'm looking at it thinking some poor kid probably threw it out the car window as they went through the intersection. But as the wind continues to lift the leaves l see the pictures...and its not a kids book. And those are pictures of Ireland!!!!

So l'm looking and thinking is that for real. l quickly jump out of the car run into the intersection pick up the book and run back to the car just in time before the light turns green. Turns out they are some pages from a desk Calender of Ireland 2007 that belonged to Seth...

About 5 minutes later as l enter a store Seth calls to say hi and relate to him my funny/puzzling story. He laughs for a few minutes and says he remembers putting it on the roof of the car last night as he was putting out the trash and l guess it was still there when we drove off to work this morning!

Seth often puts things on the roof car...l'm usually there when he does!

 This is a picture of a pub in Killarney. Seth and l took a trip to Kerry and Clare last September when he came to Ireland. There were a lot of these kinds of photos in the calender. lt made my day!

I have no doubt that its a mission to search the world over to find a grown up. As far as l've seen they're scare to find. As its hard to ever stop learning and growing l'm not sure its actually possible at all.

Before l ever got married l had those expectations and dreams of what l thought marriage would be like. l don't think l was particularly over the top in these expectations but like anyone else entering marriage they were there. ln fact Ashley and l were just discussing last night how they exist between parents and children also and how those expectations exist both ways.

Well one of my expectations, and l thought it quite admirable at the time, was that my marriage would make me a better person. My husband would encourage me to be more of the 'good' me and less of the 'bad' me. But alas the force was too strong and Carol fell to.... only kidding! l don't know what l was thinking but l thought this change would be gradual and easy and a choice of my own etc. lts not quite been exactly like that though. ln 5 months l definitely feel l've grown a lot and l hope for the better, though l've no doubt l've sharpened some hard edges too, they'll wear off! But growing in this way hasn't always been pleasurable. l have learned to stand up for myself and give my opinion in 'discussions'! l have learned to be stronger emotionally when l haven't necessarily wanted to take that on. l have learned to say sorry and back down when l honestly don't feel l should, but l don't hate this man, l love him, so it makes a lot more sense! l have learned that we are much more of a team than l initally thought we'd be and l am equally responsible for all the decisions we make.

l have learned a lot and a lot quicker than l thought l would too and l am so grateful for that and l wouldn't have it any other way.

There are a number of other things l have learned in getting married and living in our own home: lf l wait long enough the house still won't clean itself, making changes in the house requires implementing them for them to actually happen and the rights of an Irish Citizen can sometimes be over ruled by being an American Resident.

Well even if l am learning a lot and very quickly l am grateful for the fact it doesn't involve calculus and algebra and geometry! I'm still praying for you Ashley, l'm proud of the fact you're doing all this again:)

So l'm still growing up...

The first of our visitors from Ireland have come and gone. lt was so good to have Irish humour and pre-founded friendships to enjoy for the time they were here. lt made our house feel like home. The bigger the house is and the less people in it the less it feels like a home. l spent 4 hours cleaning it this morning...l'd been putting that off. Now it seems tidier, l've picked up the papers and documents that lay there for weeks on our bedroom floor and put them in drawers to be sorted through over time. lts clean and tidy. l guess l'm kind of glad that Seth doesn't pick up after himself, l don't think our house would feel lived in if he did! Plus what would l do?!

So our house now feels like home. lts furnished and it has people come and go through it, and it gets messy and tidy and messy again. So it is home...for now. Home will always be anywhere. A place where there is a certain degree of comfort and some people you know. That could be anywhere for us. That is our earthly home. But really we will never be at home here, we are passing through. That is an ever present thought...

l think sometimes friends have looked at us and thought, l am happy for them they have each other, they are really blessed. We really are. We are blessed with each other...in our home. But we shall not stay here forever and not together.  We do, right now, feast on love, no cleft of heart or body unsatisfied. lt seems we have it all in that. But we are greater beings that. That is, Man is greater. l sometimes think l am too easily satisfied with this simplicity of life, that l should want more, do more, be more. ln many ways that is true, because our hearts and minds are made for more. We are ever seeking more knowledge, more love, more, more, more. So l know l am not satisfied. lf God were a substitute for love we ought to have lost all interest in Him. Who would bother about substitutes when he has the thing itself?

We both know we are made for more than each other, made for more than life itself. No wonder this want, this longing for more exists. There is more. You might as well say that when lovers have one another they will never want to read, or eat - or breath.

There is more. We are not home yet.

Ok, so l've been asked for an update and meant to get on to it sooner, but here l am now anyway, updating!

I'm almost married one month now. Seems like it has just flown by! And we have been in our new place for 2 and 1/2 weeks. And l like it! 

Its great to be living somewhere new. I look back and realise how much I loved my life in Ireland. I loved my job, living with my family and meeting with friends every week and liked the freedome I had in my life there. Now that I am here in Minnesota I realise that the good life can be lived anywhere. I am so happy to finally be here, living with my best friend (who is at the moment downstairs watching tv and finishing off some work) and integrating ourselves into our life together. At the moment its like we've been hurled into a bit of a mess and I feel that we have somehow combined a real sense of organization and thouroghness to all the things we have to get done, and want to do, with a mix of utter chaos. 

At the moment we still need to get out to the Social Security Office (as we were married in a Court of Law Thursday last - this takes about 2 minutes - and l am now officially Carol Allen) which is only open 9-5 and l don't drive or have a car so l have to wait on my husband to be able to get time off work again! To go out there. At the moment he can't afford to take time off work.

We also need to buy a car, and then l need to re-sit a theory test and a driving test and apply for an American license, my Irish license doesn't transfer! We haven't even started looking yet. Seth's parents have been so good to us since we've arrived and have let us borrow one of their cars a lot. I love having his parents live near by! I never thought that I would ever say that about my in-laws, but Trish & Steve, I love you so much!

We need to get some furniture too, that will take some shopping around for prices and looking for some interesting pieces! I think we have the thourogh thing nailed in that area! 

And presently we are planning our last wedding! First time Wedding in Ireland, then we married officially here in Minnesota last Thursday and now our final Wedding (renewal of vows!) will take place on May 10th in our Church here in MN. So that is keeping us busy too. Hmm...reminds me l have to call the caterer...

I love our house, I love that I can walk to get my groceries! That its only a 10 minute walk to the store. Unless I'm carrying a sack of potatoes home... I like watching the squirrels play in the trees in our neighbourhood, I like listening to the thunder, watching movies with my husband, listening to all the cds that l imported into the country last year and have been without for a while, having the time to cook meals and waiting for the sound of the garage door open and my husband come in from work.

Yes, life is good. Wherever we are we have to spin our time into the process of creating a good life. Learning how to combine the best of two lives and making our life a real joy to share, to see, to be part of. Thats a journey!

Thinking of you all back in Ireland

x 

This was probably the most fascinating adventure of my life...if l could remember it!!

Well, l have finally made it to Minnesota and settled into my new home with my husband.  Our travels went smoothly in that we arrived without missing flights (our first flight was delayed and we still haven't recieved any of our 10 pieces of luggage...but thats ok! We're home and happy!) 

So this is how immigration went!:

We made our first flight to Amsterdam, had something to eat in Schipol airport and then boarded our long haul flight to Detroit, Michigan. We settled into that flight and l watched the first movie with Seth and then told him l was going to take a some sleeping pills and sleep for a few hours. l took two pills and the rest of the events of our trip were related to me by Seth and Ashley!

Seth said that after about half an hour into the second movie l just flopped forward and he lifted me back up against the seat and l stayed like that until landing. He also said l asked weird things like why do you have four eyes? He also said l couldn't drink coffee very well and ice cream didn't make it to my mouth quite (why he let me eat at all l have no idea!) When it came to leaving the airplane on landing he said he realized there was something not quite right with me. He waited until everyone else had departed the plane and l stood up and said l think l'm sick! Seth told me sit down and then said "someone get a bag!" And l was quite sick but l was still able to walk off the plane!

l got into a wheelchair (l think this probably looked quite effective anyway!) which was just as well because from then on everyone in the world except my family became multiplied by two! This was extremely confusing and l tried hard to look at everyone with one eye and focus really hard on people until l was staring at people up close with one eye (l think!)

Ashley brought me into the bathrooms of the airport where l think l continued to get sick for a while and then she helped me back into the wheelchair and we continued going...somewhere. Seth said the wheelchair did help us get through all sorts of lines and then best part was immigration!

l didn't have to say anything, because l don't think l'd have been able to answer very well. l was pretty doped up the whole way through. Seth spoke for me the whole time. Then l was asked what day it was and what my name was and where l was from and who the man who was taking me through immigration was and l answered everyone correctly and Seth breathed a sigh of relief! They didn't even ask for my freakin x-ray which l travelled so far with and forgotten numerous times and taken great care not to fold!!

We finally boarded our last flight from Detroit to Minneapolis and when l came to in Minneapolis l felt like a new person! What a blessing to be sick all the way through that flight, it was so stress free for me! And l thank the Allen's from the bottom of my heart for taking such good care of me! l thank Ash so much for being such a great sister and sticking with me and taking me into the bathrooms and to my wonderful husband for taking care of me and doing all the talking for me!

Our luggage is supposed to arrive today. Seth and l slept well in our new home last night and have spent the last few hours in Panera on the internet sorting out the long list of things we have to do to start our life togther here in Minnesota!

l will continue to update.

We won't have internet at home for another while, but l will get on top of that asap!

Thanks to everyone for praying for us the whole way through our trip. We are so thankful for your prayers and happy to be home and the weather is warm!Whoohoo

love Seth & Carol 

After work today l was sitting eating with my friend Agata and we were talking about how we first met our men!!! l realised not everyone knows how Seth and l first met...

We met in the Christian Union in UCC in Cork. Precisely, we met on the stairs leading up to the room where we met. We became friends over the period of time Seth was in lreland (5 months in total), we became good friends and he would often come out at weekends to stay with my family. Still l had no feelings for him, he was a great guy (never tried once to charm me...l realize now how l fell for that no-charm approach...very subtle!!!!!) and l enjoyed his company and that was simply that. 

ln May we started our study month, a month off from classes to study (except the American students just don't get that and they go travelling round Europe! Who said college was fun, its dead serious! As you can tell l am an extremely studious person, l worked very hard...in my job to get cash!)anyway, while Seth was away l missed him, but as far as l knew it was just his friendship and company. But l remember the first time l saw him when he came back from his travels. lt was two days after he'd arrived back to lreland and he was coming to stay with us for the weekend. lt was a beautiful sunny morning at the start of June, l was sitting out on the front step of our house reading and listening to music. He walked up the drive with his hair cut short and smiled at me. And l jumped up and ran to hug him...and l knew then l think that this guy was a catch!!

l think it was a week after that then that we had a house party at my parents house. Seth decided to throw it! lt was right in the middle of exams! Anyway, my brother and sister and l were up for it and invited loads of people over. l don't think l talked to Seth much in the course of that night, there were quite a few people over. At about 2am or so l started dropping people back into the city, Seth got a ride home from some other friends, but as l was on my way back home through the city at about 2:30 l decided to call him. l pulled up near his apartment and called his cell and asked him to come out to my car because l wanted to talk to him! 

So he got in the car and it started rain...and l remember HEM playing on the radio! And l said "Seth, l reallylike you and l don't think it would be wise to begin a relationship with you now because you're going home in two and a half weeks and it just wouldn't work. So, l just wanted to tell you how I felt and I know its foolish, so you can just tell me so and l'll just drive on home and we'll continue being friends"

l remember he just smiled at me! To be honest l can't really remember what he said, but at some point then he kissed me and that was that. lt was then l started a relationship which has brought me so much joy and travel and adventure!!

Nothing could beat those first few days of falling for him! l fell for him pretty quick in the end...all l needed was that first kiss then and once l gave dating him a go l could never look back! And everyday now, l fall a little further!

l am so excited to marry him..to spend every day waking beside him and to go on adventures with him and to travel and to make a difference for God in this world, with my husband  - my best friend.

How Seth felt is up to him to tell...that entry will be entered after we're married l believe ;) Another month!

Carol

l can say without a doubt that yesterday, the day l had my interview, was the most stressful day of me life!!

l flew up to Dublin in the morning with my mum (moral support!) and we took a bus out to the embassy. l went in and told my mum l'd find her in a nearby cafe after. My interview was for 1pm and finally at 1:30, hands shaking and not actually knowing how nervous l was, l was called to one of the 6 windows at the top of the room. A woman behind 6inches of glass (weird!) asked me what my name was and secondly asked me for the DS156 form...and l said "The what?!?".

Well l didn't have that form, l was so sure l had everything...but well, l didn't. So l burst into tears, l just couldn't control myself! The woman said "Its ok, theres a library round the corner, if you go round there you can download it and bring it back". So l went round the corner to the library, still trying to control my tears (not very well!) and l asked the Librarian if l could use the internet, she said "Sure, but theres a class in 5 minutes,so you have to be quick", l said "No prob, thats all l need". l eventually found the form on the site l needed and downloaded it. l took it up to a study desk and sat down to fill out, trying not to let tears fall on the form (l just couldn't stop myself!). So l filled it out and took it back to the embassy and went back through security and they said "Ok, better look this time, same routine". They took my cell phone and l went back inside with the form.

l went back up to the woman at the desk with the form and gave it to her. She looked up at me and said "No, you're supposed to fill this out online, then print it". l kind of controlled the tears second time! She said again "The course of romance never runs smooth", l thought maybe when l'm married it will!

l left the embassy for the second time. l couldn't go back to the library so l asked the security gaurd if there was somewhere else l could get internet access. He said a hotel down the road. So l went down and went over to the reception desk and in a barely controlled voice l asked if they had internet access anywhere, he said no and pointed me towards the city. And again l just couldn't keep it together, l was just so completely distraught at this point that l burst into tears in front of 6 or 7 more strangers! The man behind the desk that l approached said "M'am are you ok?" l said no, that l really needed to use the internet.

The people in that hotel were so kind and really tried to help me out, l found the form again and filled it out and printed it and thanked them profusely and then ran as fast as l could back to the embassy (which actually wasn't very fast because l was wearing my 'big-girl' boots!) l entered security again and went back inside and up to the desk again. She took the form from me, and then asked for my medical, my police cert, some passport photos, a letter from Seth's employer and another form. She then said l could sit down and wait. 

l waited another  5 minutes and was called up to another window by an American man. He asked me to raise my right hand and swear that everything l said and presented was correct to the best of my knowledge. l said yes! He then asked me how l had met seth, had l been to St. Johns (his University) and then told me that the National History Museum was a great wedding venue...his wife is from MN and thats where they had their wedding. He really put me at ease at this point. My voice wasn't even shaking anymore!

He looked through all our photos and said "Ok, well its a bit late in the day to process your visa now as this computer has to talk to the computer in America to give you your visa so you can collect it tomorrow or sometime" l told him l had to return to work the following day so l couldn't wait for it, but that l would return on Monday.

So thats where l am right now! l have been approved, though technically he never said those exact words, and l will fly back to Dublin on Monday to pick my visa up!

l came out of the embassy and met my mum and she said she knew something was not quite right. l kept crying sporadically throughout the day. l think l had invested more emotion into this then l actually thought l had. l came out feeling not quite what l thought l'd feel! l thought l'd be on a high for the rest of the day and my mum and l would have a great day, but l was really spent!! l slept on every bus ride for the rest of the day!

But its over! Thank God. l will collect my visa on Monday and marry my best friend after that.

Thank you for thinking of us! For praying throughout the day! Please continue to pray for us as we wait to be together again!

love Carol 

Carol finished her interview today at the United States Embassy in Dublin, Ireland, and she was approved for the K-1 Fiance Visa!!!  We can now finally start setting wedding dates and tell everyone our plans!  If you are able to contact Carol and your are happy for us, please let her know!  I'm so proud of her and all the difficulty she has endured with me to get through this visa process!  Thanks so much for your support and prayers over these last 7 months.  Thank God it's all at an end and we can now get married!  Woohoo!  It feels unreal, knowing we have completed our Visa Journey!

 - Seth

Today marks the 30th month that Carol and I have been dating.  A whole 2.5 years in terms that are easier to appreciate.  So many month anniversaries.  I wonder will we still hold onto the date we started dating once we are married?  I called Carol at half one in the morning Irish time (which is when we started dating).  I'm sure she has loved being woken up for a quick "HAPPY ANNIVERSARY" phone call each month! Hah.  It boggles my mind that we have talked almost 1000 hours on the phone.  We talk around an hour per day, and 365 days * 2 years + 30 days * 3 months + 31 days * 3 months = 913 days.  According to some website, the average married couple spends "less than 28 minutes per week (not per day) on average communicating."  In continuing with the mathematics, I've determined Carol and I will not need to speak for over 37 years, as we've already spoken our fair share to get us through...

913 days * 60 minutes per day = 54780 minutes
54780 minutes / 28 minutes per week = 1956 weeks
1956 weeks / 52 weeks = 37 healthy years of communcation!

Of course, that website never did cite the source of the 28 minute estimate, and I know I can't stay quiet for over 8 hours, let alone the next 37 years, especially when it's my best friend I'll be seeing everyday!

Anyway, I see from Carols post that I was meant to elaborate on what I do, so I should get to that now!  I work as an Applications Developer for Boston Scientific in a Custom Applications group.  It takes about 5 minutes as Carol said for me to get from front door of my home to sitting in my cube, for which I am so very thankful.  Woohoo for getting to work for almost two years without ever having to drive!  The software that I create is used by people within our company to better accomplish their day-to-day tasks and simplify the processes they follow in their positions.  Vague yet detailed, hmm.  I work with VB.NET and MS-SQL to code Windows forms applications mainly, but also work with other technologies.  I really enjoy the position and have learned a TON in the past couple years (which I find essential!).  I suppose I should end here.  There are always more posts where I can elaborate further :) P.S. Check again soon as I'll be making some updates to the site!

- Seth